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Herpes Dating - Do's & Don'ts
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One thing you must bear in mind is that Herpes doesn’t mark the end of dating. There are millions out there who have had successful relationships in spite of having herpes. Although some people with Herpes hesitate to date fearing chances of transmission, with a few changes in lifestyle, if incorporated rightly, can help boost your social life.
Many people also accept that having herpes was a blessing in disguise as it helped them become honest and understand their partners better.
Here are a few Herpes dating tips –
- There are millions like you:
Its time you start believing in this statement. According to recent statistics, about 70 percent of the US population has Herpes Simplex Virus – 1 (Oral Herpes) while another 20 percent is infected with Herpes Simplex Virus – 2 (Genital Herpes). This means that you have a lot of people to interact with and learn about the disease.
- Don’t hesitate in talking to your partner:
This is the major reason behind most relationships witnessing a premature death. This is one of the most difficult parts of Herpes dating. However, if you respect the relationship, it has to be done. Telling your partner about it after having sex wouldn’t make sense, would it?
- Get your partner tested:
With a vast majority of the US population suffering from Herpes, it is likely that your partner has it already. Get your partner tested even if he or she hasn’t shown symptoms of herpes.
- Follow precautions:
As there is no cure for Herpes, following precautions is the wisest thing to do. Avoiding sex before and after outbreaks, using a condom, and taking herpes suppressants like Valtrex can drastically reduce the risk of transmission.
- There is nothing to be ashamed of:
Staying alone is emotionally very drenching for any individual. Often people with herpes feel so ashamed of themselves that they quit dating. Nevertheless, this isn’t the right approach. Confidence and courage can help you lead a positive life.
- Change your attitude:
Life doesn’t end with herpes. Each day, people with Herpes find their ideal match on Herpes dating sites. Relationship with a herpes – infected person is greatly feasible when you have it too. Be happy and try looking out for people with the same condition. This way you will definitely connect better and have a positive relationship.
Herpes dating is a widely acceptable trend as it facilitates two individuals who share a common ground to communicate. Moreover, as the virus cannot be transmitted twice, this is regarded to be relatively safe.
Dating Someone With Herpes? Or About To? Here's Some Suggestions!
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It's a big decision dating someone with Herpes so here's some suggestions to make sure you're doing the right thing.
Your partner has shown a lot of courage to tell you that they have Herpes.
Or maybe you've learned the hard way by discovering those strange blisters around their mouth or in their "private parts".
Genital Herpes has a huge social stigma, and your partner is probably very embarrassed about it, and you're worrying about it.
The good news is... Herpes is treatable. And not that big a deal in the overall picture of a relationship.
Here's some tips and advice before dating someone with Herpes or if you are currently dating someone with Herpes.
Tips for Dating Someone With Herpes
1. Get Yourself Tested.
Ask your partner whether they've been tested for Herpes, and what type of test they got. Hopefully they have a blood test.
Then you should go get herpes tested yourself.
Why?
That way you'll know if you've already contacted it. Most people (like 70%) with Genital Herpes don't even know they have it.
If you test positive, and your partner is positive... Great!
Since you cannot pass the virus to someone already positive, then you can both enjoy a worry-free sexual intimacy.
Read Also: What Are the Risks of Dating Someone with Herpes?
2. Give Your Partner Lots of Support and Encouragement.
It takes a lot of courage for your partner to admit they have Herpes to you.
Recognize that. Don't freak out. Listen with your heart. Look into their eyes. Tell them how hard that must have been to tell you that. Give them a real hug. Maybe even cry with them.
Maybe ask them to tell you more about the virus and what it's like to live with it. It's best that you listen supportively.
Don't get sexual when your partner has "The Talk" with you. You'll both be VERY, VERY EMOTIONAL better to call it an early evening. Then go home and think about Herpes and your relationship for a couple of days.
IMPORTANT: This shows a lot about a person to admit to you they have Herpes. It shows they are honest, caring, and considerate of their partners. In this day and age, focus on these nice CHARACTER QUALITIES rather than the little virus. TELL THEM YOU ADMIRE their CHARACTER for telling you this.
3. Educate Yourself About Herpes.
You'll have to learn about Herpes. This website, herpescurforyou.blogspot.com, is a great resource to learn about Herpes. But also go do some searches on Google and start learning about this virus.
Dating someone with herpes is simply like dating someone with cold sores (which is oral herpes). It is contagious. It can look awkward. But it is a skin condition that comes and goes. And certainly is not a barrier to TRUE LOVE.
4. Make the Big Decision.
Now, you'll have to decide whether to stay with and continue dating someone with herpes.
If you love this person, the decision should be easier. In the grand scheme of relationships, Herpes is a "little skin condition". Your love will be more powerful and more meaningful. Love does conquer all.
But if you're just starting to date someone with Herpes, you'll have to ask yourself: "Is this someone I want to date long term?"
Here's the tough news: if you don't care too much about your new partner, and they have Herpes, maybe you might want to end the relationship. It's a pain to live with Herpes and it's not worth contracting the virus for a quick fling or just to get "laid".
5. Make sure that your partner goes on medication.
Before you start sleeping together and getting sexual, make sure your partner is taking suppressive medication such as Acyclovir or Valtrex. This dramatically reduces the chances of transmission.
What About Sex?
Okay, so you think your partner is worth it. And you want to get sexual and intimate. What's next?
Make your partner feel comfortable. Take things slow and lovingly. Be careful. Enjoy every little kiss and caress. Breath together.
You'll have to do a few simple things sexually to prevent transmission of the virus:
- Wear condoms. This won't completely stop the virus but it helps.
- Make sure your partner is on suppressive medication. These include Acyclovir and Valtrex. They should take it daily.
- Avoid sexual contact before, during, and after outbreaks. Encourage your partner to tell you when they feel "something" coming on. Then avoid sexual contact during the whole cycle of outbreak.
Here's the GOOD and BAD news. If you follow all these preventative measures, the chances of getting the Herpes Virus is like less than 3%. Many people have long term relationships with a Herpes partner and NEVER GET THE VIRUS.
Enjoy your sex life together. But, there's still that chance with getting the virus if you are dating someone with herpes.
Source: http://www.happy-with-herpes.com/dating-someone-with-herpes.html
Dating with Genital Herpes
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Dating With Genital Herpes
Now that you know you have genital herpes, you're out of the dating game, right? Absolutely not. There's no reason to stop looking for love and fun.
Genital herpes doesn't detract from your many desirable qualities, which have drawn people to you in the past and will continue to make you a great catch.
And it's important to understand that genital HSV is very common, affecting about 20% of the U.S. adult population.
Broaching the Topic of Genital Herpes
The first date after a genital herpes diagnosis may seem a little strange, however. If you hope to be sexually intimate with your date at some point, you may feel like you're keeping a secret. If you are one to be candid with people, you'll want to blurt it out. Don't. There are some things you should reveal about yourself right away -- for example, that you're married, or that you're just in town for the week -- but some things are better left for the appropriate moment.
It's up to you to decide the right time to tell a date that you have genital herpes. Follow two rules: First, don't wait until after having sex. Second, don't wait until you're just about to have sex -- in which case the attraction may be too strong for either of you to think rationally and act responsibly.
If in the past you tended to start a new relationship with sex, you now might want to change your approach. It might be better to break the news about herpes to someone who has already grown attached to you. Kissing, cuddling, and fondling are safe, so you don't have to tell before you do that. But use your best judgment as to how physically intimate you want to get before telling. One thing could lead to another, and you might find yourself in an awkward situation.
Dealing With Rejection
Anyone who dates should be prepared for rejection. The person you're seeing may beat a hasty retreat when he or she finds out you have genital herpes. If you get the "I just want to be friends" talk after telling your sweetheart you have herpes, consider this: He or she may have already been looking for a way out, and herpes was as good an excuse as any. What's more, anyone who disdains or humiliates you for having herpes was never worth your while.
Keep dating, and you will find someone who wants to be with you regardless of your condition. There are certainly some who wouldn't mind keeping the intimacy level just short of doing things that could transmit the virus. And of those people, it's likely that at least one will come around, and say, "Hey, I understand there's a risk, but I'm crazy about you, so I'm willing to take it."
Depending on your dating style, you might look for another person who knows he or she has herpes, if only to avoid having to discuss it. If you already use dating services or personal ads, you can also use any of those specifically for people with genital herpes. A search on the Internet for "herpes dating" will turn up several.
Source: http://www.webmd.com/genital-herpes/guide/genital-herpes-reentering-dating-scene
What Are the Risks of Dating Someone with Herpes?
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Genital HSV 1 infections aren't as persistent or infectious as genital HSV 2 infections. They're a smaller amount prone to come into action again. Which means that they're a smaller amount prone to cause recurrent breakouts. Additionally, it implies that couple of, or no, from the ladies and males with genital HSV 1 will require treatment to avoid repeated episodes simply because they happen so rarely.
When you are aware, herpes virus (HSV) has two forms. HSV 1 is the kind of herpes simplex virus that always seems around the mouth, but additionally, it may show up on the genital area and bottom. HSV 2 is the kind of herpes that always seems around the genital area and bottom, but additionally, it may show up on the mouth. HSV 1 could be passed in the mouth towards the genital area throughout dental sex. HSV 2 could be passed in the genital area towards the mouth throughout dental sex. Today, as much as eight from 10 grown ups within the U.S. have HSV 1. About one inch six have HSV 2.
Genital HSV 1 infections are a smaller amount likely than genital HSV 2 infections to reduce when you will find no signs and symptoms. Which means that between breakouts, infecting someone with HSV 1 is not as likely than infecting someone with HSV 2, therefore the uninfected partners of individuals with HSV 1 have substantially less to bother with. And lastly, males are usually less inclined to have difficult repeated episodes of genital HSV 1 than women, so males are in less chance of discomfort when they do get the problem.
All of this accumulates to 2 details. The very first is that if perhaps you are individuals are all at high-risk for herpes infection at a while within their lives, unless of course they merely get one partner who has only sex together and who isn't infected (remember, condoms don't provide complete defense against herpes). Therefore it is a positive thing that herpes isn't as serious or as harmful as Aids. For most of us, the breakouts are extremely uncomfortable and could be very upsetting. However they usually diminish with time and don't have lengthy-term effects on the person's health insurance and well-being.
The 2nd point is every bit important. It's very useful for those who wish to manage their herpes infections to possess a precise diagnosis that informs them which kind of HSV has effects on them. This helps them as well as their health care companies decide what type of medication they might need and just what, or no, safer sex steps to consider to prevent infecting their partners.
